Your dad finally agreed to move in to an assisted living community, you toured, found a great place, helped your dad figure out how many of his things he could bring, hired a moving company, and moved. And a month later? He’s not happy or maybe you’re not happy. This week we’re talking about what to do if this happens to you!
If you’re a regular reader, you probably know that I own a company called Clear path Senior Living Solutions and we help families find the right Senior living community… that’s Independent Living, Assisted Living, Memory Care or Adult Family Homes. We work really hard to do a good job finding the right place but the truth is… we don’t live in any of these places and from time time we’ve worked with families who haven’t been happy after moving in.
So in this post we’re going to talk about some reasons families have been unhappy and we’re going to take a closer look at the staffing structure of most senior living communities so you know who to bring your complaints to, should you have them.
I will outline some reasons that families reported being unhappy but the truth is these reasons don’t just apply to adult family homes, they can apply to any senior living community. Let’s review some of the reasons that families gave for being unhappy:
Incorrect medications or missed medications
Not showering
Staff not communicating changes with the family
Incorrect billing
Staff taking too long to respond to a call button
Staff not returning calls or emails
When something goes wrong, it really doesn’t matter what it is, it doesn’t feel great especially when we’re talking about your mom or dad or grandparents. You’re entrusting their care to someone else and you can’t be there 24/7.
So what should you do?
You’ll hear me say over and over “you are your loved one’s best advocate”. The first thing you should do is not feel badly about communicating your concerns. If you don’t communicate, the staff may never realize there’s an issue. As we know, you can fix what you don’t know is broken.
So let’s take a look at the staff:
Executive Director
Maybe an Assistant Director
Director of Nursing (in assisted living and memory care)
Med Tech
Office Manager
Marketing Director (the one’s who give the tours)
Maintenance Director
Director of Housekeeping
Activity Director
In a perfect world you should’ve have met everyone but here’s where things can get a little confusing or complicated: the people you will have spent the most intimate time with are usually NOT the ones you should be addressing your concerns with. When we’re talking about the healthcare of your loved one, that can be uncomfortable at the least.
Most families will take their concerns up with the caregivers or their original tour guide or marketing director, which makes sense but may not be the best route. First, chances are these staff members won’t be able to answer your questions or solve the problem.
The staff members you’re most comfortable with will be relaying your concerns to their supervisor who also may or may not be the staff member who can resolve your issue, so now you have someone relaying the information for the second, third, or even fourth time. By the time it gets to the correct staff member it’s rarely as you intended, sometimes it’s gets bigger and sometimes it’s not taken as seriously as you intended. Or you’re now in a position of having to term your story over and over again.
For example, you notice that the shampoo hasn’t been used and you ask the caregiver why. They won’t usually be able to answer, they’ll most likely need to check the shower log and before they get to do that they’re called to provide care for another resident or their supervisor isn’t available. You get the picture…
So here are the very basic places to start when you have a concern:
Anything regarding care or care staff: Email or call the director of nursing to schedule a phone or in person meeting to address your concerns. Now of course. If your care concern is urgent, do not wait to schedule a meeting. Do your best to locate the director of nursing and if you can’t then the Executive Director and of course if it’s a serious healthcare situation then call 911 and don’t wait for someone to respond before doing so. Billing questions will usually go to the office manager. Contract questions will go to the Executive Director or Marketing Director (especially if you had negotiated something something special). If you have questions or concerns about activities then you can reach out to the Activity Director. All housekeeping questions should go to the Director of Housekeeping. For maintenance questions you should ask at the front desk first. Many times the front desk staff will field requests for maintenance since the team is usually busy working on things throughout the community.
Honestly, when I worked in Senior Living, I used to say that the front desk staff is your best friend! If you don’t memorize this blog then the front desk should always know who you should address your concerns with and of course if you’re not able to resolve the situation with the appropriate director, you should go to the Executive Director.
Most importantly: Communicate. If the staff doesn’t know the problem they can’t fix it.
On a side note we have had many families over the years complain about not getting returned calls or emails. Sometimes this is because they’ve addressed the wrong staff person initially and sometimes this is just due to the high demand placed on these directors. Not only do they have to do their normal day to day jobs, but they have to handle all the questions and day to day changes that can happen with a large number of residents staff and families. Even though nothing can be perfect, you knowing your loved one best and your loved one’s care is extremely important which is why we advise families to go with their gut when making a final decision on a community. Sometimes there are things that can’t be overlooked. Most times though, a conversation with the right people can make all the difference!
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