You just moved your dad into a Senior Living Community. He was on board with the move and everything went smoothly. But the next time you visit you find out that he hates eating in the dining room. Of course you’re like…but dad…all three meals are included! Is it the food? Is it the people? Sometimes the answer isn’t what we expect.
Hi and welcome to the show! So from the title of this week’s post you can guess why some seniors hate eating in the dining room of a Senior Living Community. Full disclosure…I suffer from hearing loss too. It all goes back to childhood for me and a lot of ear infections and it’s very possible you’ve been in a conversation with me in a crowded or noisy room and thought to yourself…I don’t think she understood what I said…. It absolutely happens!
Of course as we age our hearing can get worse. Many of our clients suffer from hearing loss and many families have shared their struggles with hearing aids. My mom refuses to wear them or dad keeps losing them and they’re so expensive! We hear other things like dad isn’t very social anymore but he used to be the life of the party! Or I don’t know if dad can live in a senior community. He has to have to TV up really loud! Well I can relate to that one too.
Socialization is one of the most common reasons families choose to move their parents from their home. And that makes sense! Home can be lonely if you’re the only one there! Even if you visit your mom and dad every day.
You know what else is lonely? When you can’t hear the conversation and you’re tired of saying “what?” every time someone speaks. But hearing loss is usually progressive and so for most families it’s just something they get used to…talking louder or repeating themselves. We can also get very good at covering for our hearing loss.
Most of the time hearing loss isn’t something we talk about when considering making a move to a Senior Living Community because let’s face it you probably made the move for what would be considered more important reasons, like mom not being safe at home and needing help with meals and medications.
But the sad truth is that if hearing loss is significant it can impact that day to day care as well as those social interactions with others.
So here are a few things to try to make this an easier transition and a better experience.
- Assess the situation.
What level of hearing loss is there? Is there a better ear? Are there better hearing aids available? Do the hearing aids just need to be cleaned or does your loved one need help maintaining them or putting them in?
After you know exactly what the obstacles are you can come up with a plan. I worked with one family whose mom refused to wear hearing aids so I suggested headphones with a microphone attached. The staff and family simply spoke into the microphone and their mom was able to hear a little better. I’ll put a link to one of the products that I’m talking about in the doable downloads link. It’s something you can find on Amazon. With technology there are so many options including bluetooth headphones for that loud TV.
I also totally get it! There’s a stigma with things like walkers and hearing aids. We might need them but it can be difficult to face that fact. It makes us feel like we’re getting older and we are.
- Communicate with staff.
It’s important to work together with the staff to make things a bit easier. Is there a quieter area of the dining room where your mom can sit so that it’s easier to hear? Try to make sure she’s at that table and sitting in such a way that favors that better ear. Now this isn’t always possible because some communities have assigned seating but it’s definitely worth bringing up before move-in day. The more time they have the easier it will be to make these changes.
The other thing you can do is ask to add the cleaning and care of the hearing aids to the care plan. This should ensure that they’re being cleaned, batteries changed and that they’re put in properly as well.
Make sure all staff know which ear is that better ear. There are also cards you can get to help remind the staff that your mom or dad has hearing loss and these are also great for them to hand out when the community has outings like going out to eat!
Of course this all depends on your loved one’s level of comfort with their own hearing loss. But with new technology, assistance with that technology, communication and having a plan in place it can help improve the senior community experience… the care, and making new friends even in that dining room.
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